By Meghan Vivo
Aspen Education Group
You want to be the best parent you can be -- you read the parenting books, spend time with your child and try to stay up to date on the latest teen trends. But are you really listening to your teen? Here are a few things they may want you to know:
1. Times have changed.
You may think you know what it's like to be a teenager -- after all, you once were one. But times have changed, and a new breed of pressures and dangers are facing your teen. Sex happens younger; binge drinking can start as early as middle school; gambling is available to anyone on the Internet; and alcohol, marijuana and prescription drugs are hardly considered dangerous anymore (even though they are actually more dangerous than ever).
You may know what it's like to be a teenager -- but your child knows what it's like to be a teenager today. Rather than making assumptions, talk to your teen about what's happening at school and in their relationships. Not only can you learn a few things from your teens, but they can make you a stronger, more compassionate person if you let them.
2. Teens need help managing the stresses and pressures in their lives.
Adolescents don't instinctively know how to grow into healthy adults. They are accustomed to a fast-paced lifestyle and are in a rush to grow up. In order to actually grow up instead of just acting grown up, teens need guidance from their parents. Whether that guidance comes in the form of family game nights, nightly discussions around the dinner table or weekend activities, teens with caring, involved parents are well-equipped to grow into happy, productive adults.
Shocking as it may be, sometimes adolescents want you to say no. By setting and enforcing rules, parents give teens predictability and structure, as well as a way to combat peer pressure. Left to their own devices, teens often do whatever it takes to be accepted by other teens, including falling in with the wrong crowd, getting in trouble with the law and failing in school. Without your caring oversight, teens are left feeling isolated and alone.
3. Teens want more responsibility (and the trust that comes with fulfilling those responsibilities).
In a hurry to grow up, teens are willing to prove their maturity and readiness to take on more responsibilities. Part of their motivation is to gain your trust and additional privileges, but another part stems from simply wanting to feel valued.
A sense of responsibility helps adolescents feel vital to the family system. When you have enough confidence in your child to assign them chores and duties, they feel confident in themselves and their abilities. Even when teens act like they want to be left alone to hang out with friends and do as they wish, they need their parents' love and guidance.
4. Unlocked medicine cabinets are an open invitation to teens and their friends to abuse prescription drugs.
Research shows that teen abuse of prescription drugs such as Ritalin, Xanax, OxyContin and Vicodin is one of the biggest threats facing adolescents today. Among youth ages 12-17, prescription drugs have become the second most abused illegal drug (second only to marijuana).
Most teens report getting prescription drugs from their parents' medicine cabinet or from their friends (who often take drugs from their parents' medicine cabinets). According to Joseph Califano, chairman of the National Center on Addiction and Substance Abuse (CASA), "easily accessible medicine cabinets containing these very drugs are an open invitation to children -- fueling 'pharming' parties where teens bring drugs from home and trade or share for purposes of getting high."
To keep your teens safe, lock your medicine cabinets, properly dispose of prescription drugs you no longer need, and talk to your teens about the dangers of abusing prescription and over-the-counter medications.
5. Even "good" kids act out every once in awhile.
It is the very nature of adolescents to push boundaries. Even teenagers that get straight A's, come home on time and treat their parents with respect might be caught lying a time or two.
Resist the temptation to label your teen a "good" or "bad" kid. If you're watching carefully enough, you can always find your child making mistakes. While it's important to set rules and monitor your teen, it is equally important to catch your teen doing something right and praise their efforts.
If you are noticing more than an occasional slip-up (for example, if your teen is repeatedly lying, disrespecting your authority or engaging in other troubling behaviors), you may need help to get them back on track before they fall into a downward spiral. Therapeutic programs for teens, such as wilderness programs, residential treatment centers and therapeutic boarding schools, are able to bring out the best in troubled teens and help them re-engage in school and their relationships.
6. Teens need time to relax and unwind.
Parents often underestimate how difficult it is to be a teenager. Between school, peer pressure, family conflict and trying to define their identity, adolescents confront a great deal of stress on a daily basis. In fact, teens cite stress as the number-one reason they use drugs or alcohol.
Just as parents need time to unwind after a long day at work, teens need time to do something they enjoy each day. Whether your teen likes to play sports, read a book or play on the computer, allow them a few minutes of personal time. When monitored and time-limited, even video games, Internet surfing and television can be an acceptable way to unwind.
7. Teens want their parents to be proud of them.
Teens want their parents to be proud of them and accept them for who they are. This means resisting the urge to compare your child to others. Parents often use the comparison tactic to try to motivate their children to work harder in school, but it rarely works. Teens already spend their days assessing how they measure up and feeling badly about themselves – they are relying on you to be their biggest supporter.
8. Teens hate when their parents fight.
Teenagers watch their parents carefully to understand how romantic relationships work. They need strong role models who show them how to treat others with respect even if they don't always agree.
Conflict at home is unsettling for everyone. If you're struggling to set a good example, get help from a marriage and family therapist or other professional. Don't take it out on your kids.
9. Teens care what their parents think.
Peers have a great deal of influence on your teen, but studies show you have more. For example, in a 2004 National Campaign to Prevent Teen Pregnancy study, less than one-third of teens cited friends as having the most impact on their decisions about sex, while nearly half of teens said their parents were the most influential.
According to Project Teen Canada, a decades-long study of 5,500 Canadian teenagers, nine out of 10 teens describe their mothers as having a high level of influence in their lives, and eight in 10 say the same of their fathers. In addition, teens reported fewer arguments and feeling less misunderstood by their parents in 2008 than in previous years.
Adolescents who are strongly connected to their parents perform better in school and are less likely to smoke, abuse drugs and engage in other destructive behaviors. Even if you feel you've lost all influence, keep talking – your teens are listening.
10. Your teen really loves you.
Your teen may not show it, but they really do love you. As they grow into adults, they pull away so they can establish their own identity. Don't take the distance personally – you are the most important person in your child's life, and staying connected during adolescence means even closer bonds in adulthood.
Wednesday, January 20, 2010
Tuesday, April 21, 2009
How to Avoid Bargaining with Your Teen
“Okay, okay, I’ll let you go to the party if you stop bugging me about it.”
“I already told you John couldn’t come over, but I’ll let it go this one time.”
“If you do your homework on time, I’ll let you spend the night at Rachel’s house, even though I don’t approve of co-ed sleepovers.”
Do these scenarios sound familiar? Does your teen beg and plead to get his way until you finally just give in? Does “no” really mean “maybe” in your household?
Parents often fall into the trap of bargaining with their child, sometimes to make their own lives easier or because they want to be “friends” with their child, and sometimes because they feel guilt or shame about issues from the past such as getting a divorce, moving the family, or working too many hours.
According to Robbi O'Kelley, MSW, LCSW, CADCII, the Executive Director at New Leaf Academy of Oregon, an all-girls therapeutic boarding school for 10- to 14-year-olds, parents often fall into the bargaining trap when they are unclear about which rules are negotiable and which are non-negotiable. After years of working with parents and their children, she warns that although bargaining with your child may resolve the immediate conflict, a pattern of bargaining could indicate an unhealthy disruption in the balance of power in the parent-child relationship.
Relinquishing Your Parental Authority
Bargaining is often a sign that parents are losing authority over their child, particularly when they begin bargaining about rules that are, or should be, “hard lines in the sand,” says O’Kelley. Teens and preteens may feel a misplaced sense of entitlement that begins to wear away at a parent’s authority.
“Entitlement is when someone believes they have a right to make a choice that is outside of their power,” explains O’Kelley. “When parents repeatedly let their child make decisions that are outside of the child’s power, the child becomes inflated with a sense of self that is inaccurate in terms of the child’s belief in her ability to affect the outcome of events.”
Power is given to parents – not children – for good reason. Parents have the experience, knowledge, and wisdom to keep their kids safe and make good decisions for their child. Of course, there are times when it is fair and appropriate to negotiate and compromise with teens. Power can certainly be shared, but only when the outcome does not have the potential to harm the child.
Rather than bargaining with your child, O’Kelley recommends empowering her to influence the outcome of decisions that truly are negotiable and drawing clear boundaries in areas that are not up for debate.
“For example,” says O’Kelley, “parents may share power with a child around some of the TV programs the child watches. However, the parent should not share decision-making power with the child if a program has content that is too advanced for the child’s age and maturity level. This is an example of a non-negotiable item – there is no discussion or negotiation.”
Similarly, a middle school-aged child should not be allowed to negotiate about which friends she has sleepovers with, what parties she can attend, or how late she can stay out at night. Nor should a middle school child be allowed to choose not to go to school. “Permitting a child to do so allows the child to usurp the parent’s authority on matters that should be non-negotiable because they are in the child’s best interest,” says O’Kelley.
Reclaiming Personal Power
Not only do parents give up their authority in the bargaining process, but they also surrender their personal power – their power to make choices that align with their personal values. For example, a parent gives away his personal power when he allows a child to speak disrespectfully to adults without any consequences. The parent may feel powerless to stop the child from treating him in a manner that goes against his personal values.
The way to regain personal power, says O’Kelley, is by maintaining boundaries. Knowing which rules are negotiable and which are non-negotiable and sticking to it is the first step. It’s also important for parents to take care of their own mental and physical health by making time for themselves. In doing so, you become a role model to your child, showing her how to get her needs met in a healthy way. Knowing what your values and morals are and living by them is another way to set clear guidelines for your child.
Tips for Avoiding Power Struggles with Your Teen
While the occasional power struggle is a natural part of parenting, setting up a pattern of bargaining can set the stage for a contentious parent-child relationship during high school and beyond. The following are a few suggestions O’Kelley offers for avoiding power struggles with your teen:
1. Decide which rules or topics are non-negotiable. Talk with your spouse to make sure both of you are on the same page and are prepared to present a united front to your teen.
2. Inform your child that these particular items are no longer up for negotiation and that when you, the parent, says “no” or that a topic is not up for discussion, you are exercising your legal authority to make decisions in the best interest of your child.
3. Inform your child which areas are open for discussion and possible negotiation.
4. Recognize that a child who has negotiated before will try to negotiate again – and this time, she’ll press even harder, hoping that you will give in. Parental responses to these pleas for negotiation should be neutral but firm, such as :
• “Nevertheless, you will not be going to Susan’s house for an overnight.”• “I’m sorry you’re disappointed, but that is my final word.”• “This is not negotiable. I am not comfortable with you going to Mike’s house for the reasons we have already discussed.”• “If you continue to push this, I will have to … (ground you for the evening for not accepting my decision, take away your cell phone for 24 hours, etc.).”
5. Understand that if you have allowed your child to negotiate in the past and are trying to regain your personal power in the relationship, the process takes time. You may have to set multiple boundaries and have the same discussion several times. Teenagers will test every rule. For example, “Can I go to Jenny’s house?” “No.” “Can I go to the mall with Jenny?” “No.” “Can I study with Jenny and Sarah?” “No.”
6. Do not get stuck in an argument. Too many words are usually a sign that you are negotiating. The longer the conversation continues, the more your teen feels she can change your mind.
7. Always listen to your children. You can validate their feelings without necessarily agreeing. For example, you may want to say, “I understand that you feel left out because everyone else is going to the party. Nevertheless, I am not comfortable with you going.”
Next time your child tries to spark a debate on a non-negotiable issue or “win” in a bargaining exchange, remember these parenting tips and do yourself and your child a favor by drawing a clear, but fair boundary. If you have used these strategies in the past and your child continues to struggle with respect, rules, and authority, it may be time for a professional intervention.
Source: Aspen Education Group, By Meghan Vivo
An Interview with Robbi O'Kelley, MSW, LCSW, CADCII
“I already told you John couldn’t come over, but I’ll let it go this one time.”
“If you do your homework on time, I’ll let you spend the night at Rachel’s house, even though I don’t approve of co-ed sleepovers.”
Do these scenarios sound familiar? Does your teen beg and plead to get his way until you finally just give in? Does “no” really mean “maybe” in your household?
Parents often fall into the trap of bargaining with their child, sometimes to make their own lives easier or because they want to be “friends” with their child, and sometimes because they feel guilt or shame about issues from the past such as getting a divorce, moving the family, or working too many hours.
According to Robbi O'Kelley, MSW, LCSW, CADCII, the Executive Director at New Leaf Academy of Oregon, an all-girls therapeutic boarding school for 10- to 14-year-olds, parents often fall into the bargaining trap when they are unclear about which rules are negotiable and which are non-negotiable. After years of working with parents and their children, she warns that although bargaining with your child may resolve the immediate conflict, a pattern of bargaining could indicate an unhealthy disruption in the balance of power in the parent-child relationship.
Relinquishing Your Parental Authority
Bargaining is often a sign that parents are losing authority over their child, particularly when they begin bargaining about rules that are, or should be, “hard lines in the sand,” says O’Kelley. Teens and preteens may feel a misplaced sense of entitlement that begins to wear away at a parent’s authority.
“Entitlement is when someone believes they have a right to make a choice that is outside of their power,” explains O’Kelley. “When parents repeatedly let their child make decisions that are outside of the child’s power, the child becomes inflated with a sense of self that is inaccurate in terms of the child’s belief in her ability to affect the outcome of events.”
Power is given to parents – not children – for good reason. Parents have the experience, knowledge, and wisdom to keep their kids safe and make good decisions for their child. Of course, there are times when it is fair and appropriate to negotiate and compromise with teens. Power can certainly be shared, but only when the outcome does not have the potential to harm the child.
Rather than bargaining with your child, O’Kelley recommends empowering her to influence the outcome of decisions that truly are negotiable and drawing clear boundaries in areas that are not up for debate.
“For example,” says O’Kelley, “parents may share power with a child around some of the TV programs the child watches. However, the parent should not share decision-making power with the child if a program has content that is too advanced for the child’s age and maturity level. This is an example of a non-negotiable item – there is no discussion or negotiation.”
Similarly, a middle school-aged child should not be allowed to negotiate about which friends she has sleepovers with, what parties she can attend, or how late she can stay out at night. Nor should a middle school child be allowed to choose not to go to school. “Permitting a child to do so allows the child to usurp the parent’s authority on matters that should be non-negotiable because they are in the child’s best interest,” says O’Kelley.
Reclaiming Personal Power
Not only do parents give up their authority in the bargaining process, but they also surrender their personal power – their power to make choices that align with their personal values. For example, a parent gives away his personal power when he allows a child to speak disrespectfully to adults without any consequences. The parent may feel powerless to stop the child from treating him in a manner that goes against his personal values.
The way to regain personal power, says O’Kelley, is by maintaining boundaries. Knowing which rules are negotiable and which are non-negotiable and sticking to it is the first step. It’s also important for parents to take care of their own mental and physical health by making time for themselves. In doing so, you become a role model to your child, showing her how to get her needs met in a healthy way. Knowing what your values and morals are and living by them is another way to set clear guidelines for your child.
Tips for Avoiding Power Struggles with Your Teen
While the occasional power struggle is a natural part of parenting, setting up a pattern of bargaining can set the stage for a contentious parent-child relationship during high school and beyond. The following are a few suggestions O’Kelley offers for avoiding power struggles with your teen:
1. Decide which rules or topics are non-negotiable. Talk with your spouse to make sure both of you are on the same page and are prepared to present a united front to your teen.
2. Inform your child that these particular items are no longer up for negotiation and that when you, the parent, says “no” or that a topic is not up for discussion, you are exercising your legal authority to make decisions in the best interest of your child.
3. Inform your child which areas are open for discussion and possible negotiation.
4. Recognize that a child who has negotiated before will try to negotiate again – and this time, she’ll press even harder, hoping that you will give in. Parental responses to these pleas for negotiation should be neutral but firm, such as :
• “Nevertheless, you will not be going to Susan’s house for an overnight.”• “I’m sorry you’re disappointed, but that is my final word.”• “This is not negotiable. I am not comfortable with you going to Mike’s house for the reasons we have already discussed.”• “If you continue to push this, I will have to … (ground you for the evening for not accepting my decision, take away your cell phone for 24 hours, etc.).”
5. Understand that if you have allowed your child to negotiate in the past and are trying to regain your personal power in the relationship, the process takes time. You may have to set multiple boundaries and have the same discussion several times. Teenagers will test every rule. For example, “Can I go to Jenny’s house?” “No.” “Can I go to the mall with Jenny?” “No.” “Can I study with Jenny and Sarah?” “No.”
6. Do not get stuck in an argument. Too many words are usually a sign that you are negotiating. The longer the conversation continues, the more your teen feels she can change your mind.
7. Always listen to your children. You can validate their feelings without necessarily agreeing. For example, you may want to say, “I understand that you feel left out because everyone else is going to the party. Nevertheless, I am not comfortable with you going.”
Next time your child tries to spark a debate on a non-negotiable issue or “win” in a bargaining exchange, remember these parenting tips and do yourself and your child a favor by drawing a clear, but fair boundary. If you have used these strategies in the past and your child continues to struggle with respect, rules, and authority, it may be time for a professional intervention.
Source: Aspen Education Group, By Meghan Vivo
An Interview with Robbi O'Kelley, MSW, LCSW, CADCII
Tuesday, March 17, 2009
Money Saving Survival Tips in a Tight Economy
A weak economy and a tight job market is a killer combination for anyone who has to scrape by on a shoestring budget. And record prices at the pump and in the grocery store aren't helping.
Tahira Hira understands their situation. A professor of personal finance and consumer economics in the Department of Human Development and Family Studies at Iowa State University, Hira says there are some practical steps everyone can take to learn how to survive through tough economic times a little while longer -- and they don't involve eating Ramen Noodles for every meal.
She says the best way to save money is to first have a good understanding of where it is being spent. "Do not take any drastic steps, but take time to first review your current spending habits to find areas where expenses can be reduced or eliminated," said Hira, who serves on President Bush's Advisory Council on Financial Literacy. "Impulse buying is the main source of discretionary spending and can be reduced to enhance the financial situation if we are purposeful and thoughtful in handling our money."
To get a handle on reducing impulse buying, Hira recommends that for four weeks, record everything you spend money on daily -- cash, check and credit card. Then review your records at the end of every week. "When you review this record weekly you will start to see your money profile and will notice what you are actually doing is somewhat different than what you thought you were doing," Hira said. "You will be able to see clearly the areas where you can make an adjustment or eliminate spending entirely as you develop a plan that will fit your resources and serve your needs better."
Tahira Hira understands their situation. A professor of personal finance and consumer economics in the Department of Human Development and Family Studies at Iowa State University, Hira says there are some practical steps everyone can take to learn how to survive through tough economic times a little while longer -- and they don't involve eating Ramen Noodles for every meal.
She says the best way to save money is to first have a good understanding of where it is being spent. "Do not take any drastic steps, but take time to first review your current spending habits to find areas where expenses can be reduced or eliminated," said Hira, who serves on President Bush's Advisory Council on Financial Literacy. "Impulse buying is the main source of discretionary spending and can be reduced to enhance the financial situation if we are purposeful and thoughtful in handling our money."
To get a handle on reducing impulse buying, Hira recommends that for four weeks, record everything you spend money on daily -- cash, check and credit card. Then review your records at the end of every week. "When you review this record weekly you will start to see your money profile and will notice what you are actually doing is somewhat different than what you thought you were doing," Hira said. "You will be able to see clearly the areas where you can make an adjustment or eliminate spending entirely as you develop a plan that will fit your resources and serve your needs better."
She offered the following general money management principles:
Have a spending plan. "It could be as simple as 'spend less than what you earn,'" she said.
Get rid of most credit cards. "Keep one or two," she said. "Research has shown there is a strong relationship between the number of cards one has and the amount of debt."- Charge only what you have money to pay for.
- Always pay credit card balances in full.
- When you need to borrow money (for large expenses such as home, car, education, etc.), figure out how much you need and the best way and place to do it. "Comparison shop," she said. "And remember that just because money is available to you, it does not mean you should borrow all you can."
- Take full responsibility for your financial decisions. "Don't let others tell you what you should be doing, or spending," she said.
Hira notes that reducing spending by just $5 a day can save $150 a month -- or $1,825 a year.
She says almost everyone can find at least $5 daily by altering buying habits on these items:
Snacks, candy, soda. "Buy them in bulk and bring them from home," said Hira. Coffee, latte, fast food/cafeteria lunch, drinks. "Once again, you can bring these items from home, or reduce the number of days you buy this stuff," she said. "Pack your own lunch. This adds up fast."
Movie tickets. "Rent movies, or borrow them from the library," Hira said. Pizza/take out, restaurant dinners. Magazines. "Reduce the number you subscribe to, or use the library to read them," she said. "Do you think you can save $200 a month? In one year, you can save about $2,500 -- in five years it will be $12,782," she said.
Hira offered these ideas on more big money savings:
- Save $100 a year on gas by keeping your car tuned and tires inflated at their proper pressure. "Driving under the speed limit can also save them money in terms of gas mileage, which adds up quickly with today's prices," she said.
- Save $100 by enrolling in a "load management" plan for your electricity.
- Save $40 to $50 by dropping some options you may have on your phone, caller ID, call waiting, etc.
- Save $500/year by having a $500 deductible on auto collision insurance. "If the car is old -- eight years or more -- drop collision insurance altogether," Hira said.
- Save $100/year by switching to no-fee checking or an ATM account.
- Save hundreds of dollars in interest and fees by paying your credit card bill in full.
- Save hundreds by avoiding late payment fees on your bills.
"A major way to save money is to learn what it costs to borrow -- the total amount, source, interest rate, and time period," she said. "All of these factors play an important role in what your cost will be."
http://www.public.iastate.edu/~nscentral/news/2008/jul/moneytips.shtml
Sources: Tahira Hira and Mike Ferlazzo, Iowa State Extension
Thursday, December 11, 2008
A gift for planet Earth: Ways to save energy during the holidays
University Park, Pa. — With the holidays approaching quickly, many Penn State students have begun to string garland, wrap presents and hang lights around their rooms. This festive atmosphere is a nice backdrop as final exams loom around the corner, but students should also remember to keep their energy output low even if their holiday spirits are high. Here are some ways students — and people everywhere — can save energy this holiday season:
Use LED holiday lights
Lydia Vandenbergh, marketing assistant for Penn State’s Sustainability Office, said the University's Office of Physical Plant is encouraging students, faculty and staff to turn off their lights when they’re not in the room. Additionally, she said, the benefits of LED holiday lights outweigh those of traditional incandescent lights. “They last five times longer than regular holiday lights and use 75 percent less energy,” Vandenbergh said. “Plus, when you drop LED lights, they keep working.”
Creative tree decorating
Instead of using tinsel and other plastic materials, try stringing popcorn and cranberry garlands. These can be put outside after the holidays to feed birds. Also, Vandenbergh added that decorating with “gingerbread ornaments will not only dress up the tree, but add a sweet aroma to the room.”
Give green gifts
When thinking about giving or asking for an electronic gift, the U.S. Department of Energy suggests purchasing ENERGY STAR electronics. Rechargeable batteries also make a good gift for digital cameras and other electronics.Also, consider making a charity donation in someone else’s name or teaching a loved one a new skill like knitting or playing the guitar.
Buy local
Give gifts from a wide selection of products made locally, such as those created in Happy Valley. Some gift ideas include soup and dip mixes, fruit jams, Berkey Creamery gift certificates, a variety of chocolate delicacies, Amish cheeses and more. Visit www.localharvest.org to find products near you.
Combine errands, reduce fuel use
Holiday shoppers may find themselves making many trips to the mall, the grocery store and other places around the holidays, which can use a lot of gas. Planning trips more efficiently and combining errands into one trip saves a lot of energy.
Wrap presents while being sustainable
Instead of buying wrapping paper, try being creative with hand towels, newspaper comics, bags, old maps or other used or reusable materials. Vandenbergh said, “This creates less waste and can still be just as pretty and fun.”
Source: Jonathan McVerry and Lydia Vadenbergh, Penn State University
University Park, Pa. — With the holidays approaching quickly, many Penn State students have begun to string garland, wrap presents and hang lights around their rooms. This festive atmosphere is a nice backdrop as final exams loom around the corner, but students should also remember to keep their energy output low even if their holiday spirits are high. Here are some ways students — and people everywhere — can save energy this holiday season:
Use LED holiday lights
Lydia Vandenbergh, marketing assistant for Penn State’s Sustainability Office, said the University's Office of Physical Plant is encouraging students, faculty and staff to turn off their lights when they’re not in the room. Additionally, she said, the benefits of LED holiday lights outweigh those of traditional incandescent lights. “They last five times longer than regular holiday lights and use 75 percent less energy,” Vandenbergh said. “Plus, when you drop LED lights, they keep working.”
Creative tree decorating
Instead of using tinsel and other plastic materials, try stringing popcorn and cranberry garlands. These can be put outside after the holidays to feed birds. Also, Vandenbergh added that decorating with “gingerbread ornaments will not only dress up the tree, but add a sweet aroma to the room.”
Give green gifts
When thinking about giving or asking for an electronic gift, the U.S. Department of Energy suggests purchasing ENERGY STAR electronics. Rechargeable batteries also make a good gift for digital cameras and other electronics.Also, consider making a charity donation in someone else’s name or teaching a loved one a new skill like knitting or playing the guitar.
Buy local
Give gifts from a wide selection of products made locally, such as those created in Happy Valley. Some gift ideas include soup and dip mixes, fruit jams, Berkey Creamery gift certificates, a variety of chocolate delicacies, Amish cheeses and more. Visit www.localharvest.org to find products near you.
Combine errands, reduce fuel use
Holiday shoppers may find themselves making many trips to the mall, the grocery store and other places around the holidays, which can use a lot of gas. Planning trips more efficiently and combining errands into one trip saves a lot of energy.
Wrap presents while being sustainable
Instead of buying wrapping paper, try being creative with hand towels, newspaper comics, bags, old maps or other used or reusable materials. Vandenbergh said, “This creates less waste and can still be just as pretty and fun.”
Source: Jonathan McVerry and Lydia Vadenbergh, Penn State University
Monday, December 8, 2008
Money Saving Tips in a Tight Economy
A weak economy and a tight job market is a killer combination for anyone who has to scrape by on a shoestring budget. And record prices at the pump and in the grocery store aren't helping.
Tahira Hira understands their situation. A professor of personal finance and consumer economics in the Department of Human Development and Family Studies at Iowa State University, Hira says there are some practical steps everyone can take to learn how to survive through tough economic times a little while longer -- and they don't involve eating Ramen Noodles for every meal.
She says the best way to save money is to first have a good understanding of where it is being spent. "Do not take any drastic steps, but take time to first review your current spending habits to find areas where expenses can be reduced or eliminated," said Hira. "Impulse buying is the main source of discretionary spending and can be reduced to enhance the financial situation if we are purposeful and thoughtful in handling our money."
To get a handle on reducing impulse buying, Hira recommends that for four weeks, record everything you spend money on daily -- cash, check and credit card. Then review your records at the end of every week. "When you review this record weekly you will start to see your money profile and will notice what you are actually doing is somewhat different than what you thought you were doing," Hira said. "You will be able to see clearly the areas where you can make an adjustment or eliminate spending entirely as you develop a plan that will fit your resources and serve your needs better."
She offered the following general money management principles:
• Have a spending plan. "It could be as simple as 'spend less than what you earn,'" she said.
• Get rid of most credit cards. "Keep one or two," she said. "Research has shown there is a strong relationship between the number of cards one has and the amount of debt."
• Charge only what you have money to pay for.
• Always pay credit card balances in full.
• When you need to borrow money (for large expenses such as home, car, education, etc.), figure out how much you need and the best way and place to do it. "Comparison shop," she said. "And remember that just because money is available to you, it does not mean you should borrow all you can."
• Take full responsibility for your financial decisions. "Don't let others tell you what you should be doing, or spending," she said.
Hira notes that reducing spending by just $5 a day can save $150 a month -- or $1,825 a year.
She says almost everyone can find at least $5 daily by altering buying habits on these items:
• Snacks, candy, soda. "Buy them in bulk and bring them from home," said Hira.
• Coffee, latte, fast food/cafeteria lunch, drinks. "Once again, you can bring these items from home, or reduce the number of days you buy this stuff," she said. "Pack your own lunch. This adds up fast."
• Movie tickets. "Rent movies, or borrow them from the library," Hira said.
• Pizza/take out, restaurant dinners.
• Magazines. "Reduce the number you subscribe to, or use the library to read them," she said.
"Do you think you can save $200 a month? In one year, you can save about $2,500 -- in five years it will be $12,782," she said.
Hira offered these ideas on more big money savings:
• Save $100 a year on gas by keeping your car tuned and tires inflated at their proper pressure. "Driving under the speed limit can also save them money in terms of gas mileage, which adds up quickly with today's prices," she said.
• Save $100 by enrolling in a "load management" plan for your electricity.
• Save $40 to $50 by dropping some options you may have on your phone, caller ID, call waiting, etc.
• Save $500/year by having a $500 deductible on auto collision insurance. "If the car is old -- eight years or more -- drop collision insurance altogether," Hira said.
• Save $100/year by switching to no-fee checking or an ATM account.
• Save hundreds of dollars in interest and fees by paying your credit card bill in full.
• Save hundreds by avoiding late payment fees on your bills.
"A major way to save money is to learn what it costs to borrow -- the total amount, source, interest rate, and time period," she said. "All of these factors play an important role in what your cost will be."
Check out - http://www.public.iastate.edu/~nscentral/news/2008/jul/moneytips.shtml
Source: Tahira Hira and Mike Ferlazzo, Iowa State Extension
Tahira Hira understands their situation. A professor of personal finance and consumer economics in the Department of Human Development and Family Studies at Iowa State University, Hira says there are some practical steps everyone can take to learn how to survive through tough economic times a little while longer -- and they don't involve eating Ramen Noodles for every meal.
She says the best way to save money is to first have a good understanding of where it is being spent. "Do not take any drastic steps, but take time to first review your current spending habits to find areas where expenses can be reduced or eliminated," said Hira. "Impulse buying is the main source of discretionary spending and can be reduced to enhance the financial situation if we are purposeful and thoughtful in handling our money."
To get a handle on reducing impulse buying, Hira recommends that for four weeks, record everything you spend money on daily -- cash, check and credit card. Then review your records at the end of every week. "When you review this record weekly you will start to see your money profile and will notice what you are actually doing is somewhat different than what you thought you were doing," Hira said. "You will be able to see clearly the areas where you can make an adjustment or eliminate spending entirely as you develop a plan that will fit your resources and serve your needs better."
She offered the following general money management principles:
• Have a spending plan. "It could be as simple as 'spend less than what you earn,'" she said.
• Get rid of most credit cards. "Keep one or two," she said. "Research has shown there is a strong relationship between the number of cards one has and the amount of debt."
• Charge only what you have money to pay for.
• Always pay credit card balances in full.
• When you need to borrow money (for large expenses such as home, car, education, etc.), figure out how much you need and the best way and place to do it. "Comparison shop," she said. "And remember that just because money is available to you, it does not mean you should borrow all you can."
• Take full responsibility for your financial decisions. "Don't let others tell you what you should be doing, or spending," she said.
Hira notes that reducing spending by just $5 a day can save $150 a month -- or $1,825 a year.
She says almost everyone can find at least $5 daily by altering buying habits on these items:
• Snacks, candy, soda. "Buy them in bulk and bring them from home," said Hira.
• Coffee, latte, fast food/cafeteria lunch, drinks. "Once again, you can bring these items from home, or reduce the number of days you buy this stuff," she said. "Pack your own lunch. This adds up fast."
• Movie tickets. "Rent movies, or borrow them from the library," Hira said.
• Pizza/take out, restaurant dinners.
• Magazines. "Reduce the number you subscribe to, or use the library to read them," she said.
"Do you think you can save $200 a month? In one year, you can save about $2,500 -- in five years it will be $12,782," she said.
Hira offered these ideas on more big money savings:
• Save $100 a year on gas by keeping your car tuned and tires inflated at their proper pressure. "Driving under the speed limit can also save them money in terms of gas mileage, which adds up quickly with today's prices," she said.
• Save $100 by enrolling in a "load management" plan for your electricity.
• Save $40 to $50 by dropping some options you may have on your phone, caller ID, call waiting, etc.
• Save $500/year by having a $500 deductible on auto collision insurance. "If the car is old -- eight years or more -- drop collision insurance altogether," Hira said.
• Save $100/year by switching to no-fee checking or an ATM account.
• Save hundreds of dollars in interest and fees by paying your credit card bill in full.
• Save hundreds by avoiding late payment fees on your bills.
"A major way to save money is to learn what it costs to borrow -- the total amount, source, interest rate, and time period," she said. "All of these factors play an important role in what your cost will be."
Check out - http://www.public.iastate.edu/~nscentral/news/2008/jul/moneytips.shtml
Source: Tahira Hira and Mike Ferlazzo, Iowa State Extension
Friday, September 26, 2008
Halloween Candy in Moderation
Halloween is a fun holiday, but can be nutritionally challenging for everyone in the house, including parents. Studies show that more than 90 percent of children go trick-or-treating and 90 percent of parents eat treats from their children’s candy bags.
Sound familiar?
Even though we take an “everything in moderation” approach to eating, the majority of us have little room in our diet for “discretionary” calories (those calories from foods that provide no nutritional value.) So, it is important to know how many extra calories these Halloween treats provide. “Everything in moderation” becomes hard to do when the Halloween bag lasts until Thanksgiving! Below are some average numbers.
1 “fun size” chocolate candy bar: 80-100 calories
1 “bite size” chocolate candy bar: 40-55 calories
25 small jelly beans: 140 calories
20 pieces of candy corn: 100 calories
2 caramel chews: 80 calories
Licorice (3 sticks): 130 calories
The caloric content of these candies may not seem too high, but if you eat two, three or even more treats per day, those extra calories can add up quickly. It only takes an extra 250 calories per day above your daily caloric needs to make you gain ½ pound each week.
Here are ideas to protect yourself from extra calories, but still keep Halloween fun for kids.
• Hand out non-edible Halloween treats that kids love like glow-in-the-dark stickers, glow sticks, rubber creepy crawly snakes, spiders, worms, Halloween themed rings, bracelets, hair bands, pencils, crayon packs or washable tattoos. Dollar stores or online novelty stores often carry these fun treats.
• Out of sight, out of mind. Don’t keep the leftover candy in a bowl on the counter. Keep the candy in a cabinet or freezer so you or your kids won’t be tempted to grab just “one piece” every time you pass by.
• Make your own 100 calorie treat bags. Pack some snack size bags with a couple pieces of candy that equals 100 calories. It’s an alternative to the 100 calorie snack chip bags you buy at the store.
• Hand out candy that doesn’t appeal to you! The leftovers won’t be as tempting.
• Hand out sugar-free gum packs.
• Wait until the day of Trick-or-Treating to buy candy to give out.
• Increase your exercise so you can fit in the extra “discretionary” calories!
• Set a time line. Throw away any uneaten candy by November 7.
• Limit yourself to one “treat” per day and enjoy every bite!
Adapted from mom-rd.com
Sound familiar?
Even though we take an “everything in moderation” approach to eating, the majority of us have little room in our diet for “discretionary” calories (those calories from foods that provide no nutritional value.) So, it is important to know how many extra calories these Halloween treats provide. “Everything in moderation” becomes hard to do when the Halloween bag lasts until Thanksgiving! Below are some average numbers.
1 “fun size” chocolate candy bar: 80-100 calories
1 “bite size” chocolate candy bar: 40-55 calories
25 small jelly beans: 140 calories
20 pieces of candy corn: 100 calories
2 caramel chews: 80 calories
Licorice (3 sticks): 130 calories
The caloric content of these candies may not seem too high, but if you eat two, three or even more treats per day, those extra calories can add up quickly. It only takes an extra 250 calories per day above your daily caloric needs to make you gain ½ pound each week.
Here are ideas to protect yourself from extra calories, but still keep Halloween fun for kids.
• Hand out non-edible Halloween treats that kids love like glow-in-the-dark stickers, glow sticks, rubber creepy crawly snakes, spiders, worms, Halloween themed rings, bracelets, hair bands, pencils, crayon packs or washable tattoos. Dollar stores or online novelty stores often carry these fun treats.
• Out of sight, out of mind. Don’t keep the leftover candy in a bowl on the counter. Keep the candy in a cabinet or freezer so you or your kids won’t be tempted to grab just “one piece” every time you pass by.
• Make your own 100 calorie treat bags. Pack some snack size bags with a couple pieces of candy that equals 100 calories. It’s an alternative to the 100 calorie snack chip bags you buy at the store.
• Hand out candy that doesn’t appeal to you! The leftovers won’t be as tempting.
• Hand out sugar-free gum packs.
• Wait until the day of Trick-or-Treating to buy candy to give out.
• Increase your exercise so you can fit in the extra “discretionary” calories!
• Set a time line. Throw away any uneaten candy by November 7.
• Limit yourself to one “treat” per day and enjoy every bite!
Adapted from mom-rd.com
Monday, June 2, 2008
Gardening with Young Children--Dig In!
Spring is a wonderful time to introduce children to the wonders of gardening. Young children learn by experiencing “hands on” and by having opportunities to think about, re-visit, and question their experiences. Through gardening, we can encourage this hands-on curiosity and discovery.
Get Ready to Dig In
Gardening does not have to be overwhelming, nor does it have to be an everyday or every week experience. Gardening can be part of the natural environment we create in working with children.
Try creating an environment where meaningful exploration can occur and provide children the opportunity to practice taking care of a plant or garden, and the opportunity to explore their ideas freely. Young children can have a positive gardening experience simply by starting a seed or bulb, digging in dirt, or taking care of a house plant. Where and how you start gardening with children is based on a few ideas:
• Take time to reflect on what the children (and you) want to discover about gardening. Make a list of children’s names and beside each name, write their ideas (display so children can see; add pictures and symbols if needed).
• Help spark ideas by looking at gardening books written for working with children.
• Consider what you will need and have access to (outside/inside areas, lighting, water, materials to support plants and gardening, such as tools, containers, seeds, and plants).
Consider Safety
Be safe and use good judgment when working with young children. Know which plants are safe for children, and be aware of what is in the potting soil. Read the label carefully and ask your local garden center about potting soil that is best for young children. This is the same of seeds. Some seeds (and bulbs) are coated with chemicals harmful to young children. Seeds should not be used with children under the age of three. Watch also if using water or tools with young children. All activities and materials should be well supervised.
Contact the National Poison Control hotline (800-222-1222) for information on poisonous plants and seeds.
Dig In!
Encourage the children to participate and to help in the process of gardening. Suggest ways to predict, measure, and care for the ongoing growth of their seed or plant. (Taking photographs may help children revisit and organize thoughts about the experience.)
Children may be able to:
· Help get supplies ready (line table with newspaper, pass out supplies, fill watering can, etc.)
· Scoop dirt into the pots or dig the ground and soil
· Water and mist the plants
· Count seeds
· Draw pictures of seed, growth, plant, etc.
Tip:
If children have to wait for a turn during a gardening activity, have them draw in garden journals (notebooks or pages stapled together), dig in a container of dirt, or have a basket available filled with books on gardening or related themes. Watching a plant grow and change, as well as possibly produce a flower or fruit, shows children that their efforts to treat the plant respectfully and nurture its growth have made a difference. Through gardening, not only do plants grow, but children grow, too. Give them the tools, dig deep, and watch how their garden grows!
Developed by Christine Belinda, Penn State Better Kid Care Program
Dr. James E. Van Horn, CFLE, Better Kid Care Program Director
253 Easterly Parkway, State College, PA 16801 • Phone: 1-800-452-9108 • Website: betterkidcare.psu.edu
Sources: www.kidsgardening.com/, www.poison.org/, http://www.aapcc.org/
Get Ready to Dig In
Gardening does not have to be overwhelming, nor does it have to be an everyday or every week experience. Gardening can be part of the natural environment we create in working with children.
Try creating an environment where meaningful exploration can occur and provide children the opportunity to practice taking care of a plant or garden, and the opportunity to explore their ideas freely. Young children can have a positive gardening experience simply by starting a seed or bulb, digging in dirt, or taking care of a house plant. Where and how you start gardening with children is based on a few ideas:
• Take time to reflect on what the children (and you) want to discover about gardening. Make a list of children’s names and beside each name, write their ideas (display so children can see; add pictures and symbols if needed).
• Help spark ideas by looking at gardening books written for working with children.
• Consider what you will need and have access to (outside/inside areas, lighting, water, materials to support plants and gardening, such as tools, containers, seeds, and plants).
Consider Safety
Be safe and use good judgment when working with young children. Know which plants are safe for children, and be aware of what is in the potting soil. Read the label carefully and ask your local garden center about potting soil that is best for young children. This is the same of seeds. Some seeds (and bulbs) are coated with chemicals harmful to young children. Seeds should not be used with children under the age of three. Watch also if using water or tools with young children. All activities and materials should be well supervised.
Contact the National Poison Control hotline (800-222-1222) for information on poisonous plants and seeds.
Dig In!
Encourage the children to participate and to help in the process of gardening. Suggest ways to predict, measure, and care for the ongoing growth of their seed or plant. (Taking photographs may help children revisit and organize thoughts about the experience.)
Children may be able to:
· Help get supplies ready (line table with newspaper, pass out supplies, fill watering can, etc.)
· Scoop dirt into the pots or dig the ground and soil
· Water and mist the plants
· Count seeds
· Draw pictures of seed, growth, plant, etc.
Tip:
If children have to wait for a turn during a gardening activity, have them draw in garden journals (notebooks or pages stapled together), dig in a container of dirt, or have a basket available filled with books on gardening or related themes. Watching a plant grow and change, as well as possibly produce a flower or fruit, shows children that their efforts to treat the plant respectfully and nurture its growth have made a difference. Through gardening, not only do plants grow, but children grow, too. Give them the tools, dig deep, and watch how their garden grows!
Developed by Christine Belinda, Penn State Better Kid Care Program
Dr. James E. Van Horn, CFLE, Better Kid Care Program Director
253 Easterly Parkway, State College, PA 16801 • Phone: 1-800-452-9108 • Website: betterkidcare.psu.edu
Sources: www.kidsgardening.com/, www.poison.org/, http://www.aapcc.org/
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
